Saturday, May 28, 2011

So Just Forget Carmen San Diego Huh?

Even we knew what Carmen San Diego looked like even though we never quite figured out WHERE THE HELL SHE WAS EXACTLY!!! But riddle me this, what in the living hell does a weapon of mass destruction look like?! Somebody, anybody please tell me what they look like?! Apparently our country has been on this wild goose chase for a few long years trying to find and secure these WMD's just so they do not get used on us but so we can use them on other countries? I remember in the seventh grade learning about America bombing Hiroshima, Japan with the first ever nuclear bomb created by Albert Einstein in World War II, and in my opinion that was the the first form of a weapon of mass destruction. Back then, military weapons were huge and obvious, but that was in the late 40's and fifties, and you know how with our technology these days things are just as powerful in a smaller and more compact space. The sad thing is that I came up with this theory when I was high celebrating the death of Osama Bin laden (sue me.) But cmon now! You cannot honestly sit there and tell me that you believe these technologically advanced and highly intelligent countries have missiles the size if Shaq buried underneath some secret chamber underground set to aim and strike American soil if we dare slip up (many countries blatantly have missiles aimed at us as it is)...I just refuse to believe this. I believe that because technology is so advanced terrorists probably have weapons the size of teardrops capable enough to take out entire cities or small states even. With that said, I am sure that nuclear missiles are out there still, they just aren't as hard to find as our media is making them seem (but they always try and sweep things under the rug these days when it comes to things that are threatening to civilization.) There are however, weapons of mass destruction that exist in our OWN damn country as well that are not even recognized by the naked eye of the public. For starters, you have these damn gas prices that are slowly killing everyone piece by piece at the pump. Then there are reality television shows that are killing off everyone's concept of "cool" and brain cells in general. Then last but not least, you have these half-assed parents who are now starting at the age of fifteen who want to bring kids into the world and not have a single thing planned in regards to raising them or establishing some sort of foundation for them to raise their kids upon. While they are sending thousands upon thousands of troops overseas to fix issues in other countries, we don't look twice at the issues that are constantly and consistently piling up in our own country. It is all sad, we know what solution we are after but fail to open our minds up as to how to find it or even consider that what we are looking for may not always be in the form that we envisioned. The sad thing is that terrorists or scientists or whoever is creating these weapons of mass destruction are probably (hypothetically) neatly and quietly storing their little concoctions in the back of their fridges right next to their milk and cheese while they watch American soldiers terrorize their neighborhoods through their windows with a smirk on their face because they know that what they have will not be found anytime soon.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Now Before You Get All in a Frenzy...

Last night I definitely decided to stay off of blogs to avoid two things:

1. Laughing my ass off
2. Shaking my head at ignorant posts about Osama Bin Lade

But last night on Twitter I got a good dose as to what my peers are feeling about the situation and how they interpret what is likely to happen next.

First thing I am gonna say is that THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT 2012 BULLSHIT! Get over it people! Osama Bin Laden's death may launch an attack or a whole new series of war, but I highly doubt that the Taliban is going to look on the calendar and actually Nuke us on whatever day the Mayans took a break from continuing on the calendar. Second thing, Osama's death has nothing to do with the general beliefs of people of the Islamic faith, please stop with all the ignorance surrounding Islam and the Muslims that are faithful to the religion. Regardless of how the media portrays Muslims or how your own ignorance interprets what Muslims believe in, please know that their religion is solely based on PEACE.

I am quite happy that Osama Bin Laden is no longer a worry of our country or anyone else's in the world, but let us not forget that this man did not operate by himself, he had a wide range of followers willing to die for whatever cause he would arrange. Our new worry should be on how to find and stop them from inflicting more terror and pain around the world. It was not ignorant for anybody to go out last night and celebrate that mans death, Personally, Osama Bin Laden was NOT a man. He killed using others, he ran, and he hid. That is not the description of the man, it is the description of a coward who rightfully deserved to die. I had a few friends who were disgusted at the whole idea of people celebrating a man's death does not mean that they are better or worse than anybody who indeed celebrated. To be honest, I think that most people only used that "that's wrong" logic for brownie points. He is dead, he is gone, let us move on.

The death of Bin Laden certainly did not lower our sky high gas prices, find a cure for HIV/AIDS, feed the hungry, stabilize the economy, or bring our troops back home which are all issues that our country must continue to focus on. Sure one day of celebrating and showing for your patriotic love for America is great and all, but it damn sure did not fix one of those problems today, now did it? Osama being gone is just one tasked marked off on this country's very long and insanely organized agenda. We should take that same patriotism we displayed and make it everlasting to help out our country on a daily basis and help improve our own being instead of waiting on our tardy, unreliable, and non-responsive government.

Let Osama Bin Laden's death be a wake up call to not only American's, but the world as well that we really need to wake up and get our priorities straight before we get one small victory, get comfortable, and decide to get lazy and end right back where we first started.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Fahrenheit Foolery & Fuckery

Oh Spring is here! Spring is here! Spring is here! I'm not talking about that damn day that is marked on the calendar in March that says "Spring begins today" when it was fucking thirty degrees below Jesus outside, but the actual feeling that comes along with the season that defines what Spring really is. The weather, the change of the wardrobes, the greenery making its return to the atmosphere...that is the Spring that I am talking about! I left out the temperature however (I know I said weather, but that isn't necessarily the same thing), I just love the temperature! Great Springtime temperature brings many great things...actually that is the reason for the season once we are all done with the damn rain from April that is suppose to bring May flowers that I could most definitely do without because I am allergic! The temperature brings a lack of clothes, lack of care, but sadly it also forces people to lack in their thought process and make them total assholes and idiots. I will never fully be able to comprehend why when the good weather rolls around, the fools of the earth transpire and the crime rate skyrockets! It is like these people plant their ignorance, stupidity, and foolishness underground in the early parts of Fall and once the warm weather comes back around their same old dumb ass ways of thinking sprout from the ground and find a way right back into their minds. Just last week, I was on Twitter and everyone and their mother was talking about going to the zoo or the word "zoo" was fused into each one of their tweets, I looked a little closer and dug a little deeper only to discover that everyone was tweeting about the zoo because there had been a stabbing from some idiotic group of teens at the National Zoo in Washington, D.C. Are we fucking serious?! The National Zoo is FREE people! FREE! But then again that just goes to prove my theory about how people do not know how to act around anything that is FREE! For the past couple springs and summers the DMV (DC, Maryland, and Virginia) area has been one of the worst places to be as far as crime is concerned. Apparently, we just LOVE tearing shit up, killing each other, and ruining fun for tourists who slightly inflate our areas income as a way to enjoy the awesome weather that our area is blessed with from time to time. Stabbing at the zoo, it sounds like a joke but it is a very sad topic to discuss given their were probably plenty of people there who were looking to have a great time on a Monday afternoon. The animals were probably more than confused as to who should have really been locked up and put in a cage as people were forced to evacuate the zoo and pretty much stampeded trough the zoo to an exit knocking over concession stands and even strollers with children in them. What probably shocked me most is how some of the witnesses and patrons at the zoo acted once the news crews got there. From what I heard and read in the papers and online is that a female news anchor was harassed and ridiculed as she was trying to do her job and get a little bit of information about what had occurred that day at the zoo, but the coonery continued. There is nothing cool about acting a fool on camera to show the world that their negative stereotypes about young black people are in fact correct. In the midst of all this madness, the manager of the 7-Eleven across the street from the zoo was attacked and robbed as well. He spoke out and aired his frustration about how he is faced with the same issue every year on the same day, African-American Family Day. Fucking shame. If this is how people are going to act with the heat just beginning to rise, imagine what lies ahead when Summer comes along and scorches the area.(Kinda hard to optimistic huh?) I'm good and damn sure that people's brains do not literally bake and melt and get scrambled when the heat increases, or does it? It is like people leave their common sense, reasonable logic, and smarts at the gates of seasons change. (I would know I worked at Disney, home of the idiots!) Oh yea people please do not forget that just because it is okay to show a little more skin does not mean that you have to show ALL OF IT! We are not trying to see all of that, I promise you. I saw a girl the other day with more ridges in her cellulite ridden ass than a bag of ripple UTZ BBQ chips, disgusting! And ladies please do not think that showing a little more ass and boob is the key to keeping a guy around to build a substantial, lasting, and meaning relationship. Us dudes love Spring Flings and Summer fun as a substitute for an actual relationship. Trust me, there are a million girls doing and wearing the same things that you are in the name of the season; don't sell yourself short. But once again, like always, I digress; I just think that summer flings are the longest form of a one-night stand ever. But for the remainder of the season and throughout Summer let's increase the peace as the heat rises and not the crime rate. Let's keep our cool rather than lose it, and let's create memories rather than witness nitemares. Springtime is here!