Can I get an encore! do you want more?!...I swear Jay-Z's The Black Album was one of the best things to ever happen to Hip Hop, even though he fooled us all into thinking he really retired back in 2003. Oh well, the king is here to stay I suppose, even though it's so much speculation on his the best MC in modern day and OF ALL TIME! who cares?! I was on Twitter earlier today, like I am everyday, and I read a tweet from one of my most awesome followers (@theprettybitchh). She said "people think if they buy me things and take me to all these places that impresses me but I'm really into doing simple things like the zoo". When I read this I was just humbled because WE NEED MORE PEOPLE like this in society; people who appreciate the little, non-flashy, simplistic things in life. I was especially blown away because this goes to prove the point that people do not want much when it comes to dating and courtship. Nowadays, I hear too much fuckery about how dudes spend incredible amounts of money just to impress females or get a compliment. My grandfather would have my head! I wish I muthafuckin would buy a new outfit, an expensive dinner, and jewelry just to be paid a compliment or have an attempt at getting a smile out of a female. The problem is, people don't believe in themselves any more when it comes to the opposite sex, our generation has to speak through money instead of their own fucking mouths! It's a shame! I hear of guys serenading women in jewels and buying them these outrageously priced dinners just to have a shot at a little piece of ass! I'm pretty sure that the females that go on these dates are pressured as well, not all of them though, because there are in fact a shit load of gold diggers out there! I have heard from a few females friends that they feel as if they think that the guy expects something after dinner or the entire date to reward his incredible showing of this bank account or last pay check. Whatever it may be, most girls that I have spoken to said that the fancy dates and things are not going to get these guys anywhere but a pair of blue balls and a lowered bank account. They didn't say those words exactly, but that is what the fuck I drew from it. I'm not the one to brag but most of the dates I have been on have been simple dates like a long walk, swimming, dinner & a movie (classic, and the classics never die!), or do the group date thing (those are always fun and less tense) and not had a single complaint or left anyone dissatisfied. I remember I was on a double-date with one of my friends and he was sitting there trying his hardest to impress this girl he was interested in by taking her to Cheesecake Factory for a first date...now I'm gonna digress here for a bit, because Cheesecake Factory is not necessarily the ideal first date spot...it's more like a "we're in a relationship so I don't mind it let's celebrate" kinda place, not for first dates. But this jackass decides to challenge, almost dare his date to order the most expensive thing on the menu. He was pretty adamant about his approach too, he literally said, "You can order whatever you like on this menu, I don't care if it's the New York Strip Steak itself! Matter of fact, you can even order an appetizer if you like!" I'm sitting across the table looking at this fool wondering if he really knows what the hell he just did. He had just set the bar for what she is possibly going to expect on each date from this point on. Never mind the fact that the New York Strip is 27.99, and the appetizers start at damn near eight dollars and he works a part-time job! Being his friend, I could easily see the front that he was putting up, and how much he really believed that spending big money on dinner was going to be the big pay-off. I could also read his dates face, it was obvious to see that she took him for a fool who was willing to do anything for her attention and affection; she was also very disinterested in him, it was obvious. So after dinner we all piled in his car and headed home. Him and his date sat in the front and my date and I sat in the back. On the way home, I noticed that the ride was a bit longer than usual, but I did not give two shits...I was enjoying holding and talking to my date...she was too sweet. This idiot on the other hand was being the biggest creep ever! He had the Al Green playing all low in the background and making very weird, verbal sexual advances toward his date. We pulled up to her house first, and as he got out to open her door he gave me the thumbs up as if he were about to score a touchdown with her vagina or something. He walked her to her door, she opened the door, thanked him for the evening, and walked the fuck in the house! My date and I were in the car cracking up at what we had just witnessed. He walked back to the car and told us some dumb ass reason as to why she did not let him in her house. I think the story was :oh she was on her period and her mom said she can't have company this late." It was clearly 8p.m. Based on the events that had taken place beforehand it was obvious that she just wasn't interested in him and that he damn near scared her off by posing to be somebody he was not. The next stop was my dates house, I walked her to her door and got a kiss, and she went in. My friend is sitting in the car looking uberly mad for some reason...go figure right? I walk back to the car with the biggest grin on my face, almost in the form of a gloat, and asked him why he was so mad. He told me it was because he felt like a dumb ass for wasting all that money. I agreed with him, and told him everything that he did wrong on the date; I'm no Hitch or anything but I think I can understand and clearly see why he did not get far with her at all. I noticed that she had not once smiled him either, but you can't tell someone it's wrong when they are convinced that what they are doing is right. Point is, dating should be a fun, mutual, and tension-free environment where the only impressions should be coming from the eyes and the words being spoken, not the wallet or the location of the date. So for all the guys out there who think they need to be new this and that, I-gotta-buy-her-expensive-shit-in-order-for-her-to-like-me I would like to take this time out to tell you that you look like a jack ass! Peace to Red Foreman and Bob Barker!
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