So...the name is Foster

My name came from a weird little idea that my Dad had back when he was in the Army...for some odd reason he felt that his first-born should be named Foster. He and his girlfriend at the time thought that me being named Foster would have been soo amazing...LUCKILY they didn't last and my Mom picked up where my Dad's ex left off. She too for some ODD reason fell in love with the idea of a child named Foster as well. I find it so funny that my mom had no clue that my Dad had this insane plan to name his first born Foster. Few years after I was born, Mom found the love letters containing my Dad's lifelong plans with his "then" girlfriend! Mom blew up at Dad but loved him all the same! To put it in a nutshell
Fast-fowarding almost 20 years later, and I now have a beef with my name. I have been getting the dumbest questions and comments as to why the hell my parents decided to name me Foster. What pisses me off more is when I have to verbally speak my name to a person who does not know me or hear that well. When I introduce myself to people there's always that one jackass that asks...Boston? Oscar? Forrest? Where and the fuck did you get Boston and Oscar from?! I give Forrest a pass simply because it is my favorite movie OF ALL TIME! (Forrest Gump) but seriously I know...or at least hope that people are not that damn retarted! Oh yea which brings me to my next point, the last name gig! My first name is Foster! Not the last! Damn customer service hotline people make me sick! "And what is your first name sir?" I just told you jackass...isn't or shouldn't my name be in your computer server thingy? But I HAVE learned to deal with this unfortunate rise of stupidity and ignorance, after all my name is pretty decent after hearing some of this other name fuckery over the past couple years. I mean seriously the parents of my generation have lost their fucking minds! Names after medicine, cars, superficial places spelled backwards, or some guy they heard the name of in a movie! At least I can feel a bit comfortable knowing that my name is a famous dessert, brand of sunglasses, and my all-time favorite BEER! So the next time somebody asks me "is your name really Foster?" I will simply reply..."yes, and what is your boring name?"